Reminder that when Paul instructs us in Eph 4 to not let our anger linger long, he knew what he was talking about....I got these stages from John Maxwell
KNOW THE STAGES OF A SLIDING
CONFLICT
“Do not
let the sun go down on your anger….”
#1 REMEDY Stage –
“Fix the Problem”
Characteristics:
1) RECOGNITION__ of a
problem.
2) DISAGREEMENT_ on how
to solve it.
3) COMMITTMENT__ to
solve it.
4)
BELIEF_that is can be solved.
5)
HONEST_communication.
90% OF ALL CONFLICT CLEARED UP HERE
If the conflict is NOT solved…
#2 REPOSITIONING_Stage – “Who caused the
problem?”
Characteristics:
1) The
focus shifts from solving the problem to PROTECTING MYSELF___.
2) People
are NERVOUS_.
3) They GENERALIZE_
everything.
4) Low TRUST_level.
5) Communication
is CAUTIOUS_ and not clear.
LESS THAN 50% CLEARED UP HERE
If the conflict is NOT solved…
#3 RIGHTS_ Stage – “I’m right, so you
must be wrong.”
Characteristics:
1) I’m the
good person who has the only possible answer.
2) People
take SIDES_.
3) People
are LABLED___.
4) The
focus shifts from solutions to WINNING__.
5) Communication
is OVERSTATED and DISTORTED.
5% RESOLUTION
If the conflict is NOT solved…
#4 REMOVAL Stage – “Get rid of those
people.”
Characteristics:
1) People
are no longer satisfied with getting their own way.
Now
they have to get rid of the opposition
2) The goal
is a DIVORCE__.
3) People
are now in different CAMPS___.
4) Trust is
GONE__.
1% RESOLUTION
If the conflict is NOT solved…
#5 REVENGE__Stage – “Make someone pay.”
Characteristics:
1) People
are not satisfied with a resignation.
2) People
become FANATICS__.
3) The
conflict has become a PERSONAL/GOD_ issue.
4) They
feel that it is IMMORAL_ to stop fighting.
5) The
conflict goes OUT OF BOUNDS_.
0% RESOLUTION OUTSIDE OF DIVINE INTERVENTION
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